(Hannah is curled up in a corner of a bedroom at her aunt's house. She is imagining her mother walking through the door with a great big smile and open arms, but as minutes turn into hours, Hannah begins to feel disappointed and anxious)
Hannah: Mom, I really miss you...I wait for you to come home every day...I know you said you can't...but I can't...help but wonder what the point of my life is...Auntie said it would get easier, but it hasn't. School is never easy; friends they sometimes leave me. I'm starting to feel angry every day. Why don't you come and get me? You said you loved me, but I'm having a hard time believing it these days. Where is my Dad? Does he love me? When will I see him?
The weeks are getting long and days are lonely...I just need someone to hold me...
Usher The Sunrise
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Masterpiece
When Jesus said, "Love your neighbor as yourself," he embedded an important principle. How are we to love each other, if we first do not love ourselves? If you're like me, you've been taught that the love of self is wrong, and I agree with the main idea. However, I believe there is a difference between loving yourself and idolizing yourself.
Idolizing yourself comes from having your sense of worth rooted in your accomplishments or the acceptance of others. Unfortunately, neither our accomplishments nor the acceptance of others have any lasting effect on the way we behave toward our neighbors.
Clarke's Commentary on The Bible says this about Matthew 19:19 -
"Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself - Self-love, as it is generally called, has been grievously declaimed against, even by religious people, as a most pernicious and dreadful evil. But they have not understood the subject on which they spoke. They have denominated that intense propensity which unregenerate men feel to gratify their carnal appetites and vicious passions, self-love; whereas it might be more properly termed self-hatred or self-murder. If I am to love my neighbor as myself and this "love worketh no ill to its neighbor," then self-love, in the sense in which our Lord uses it, is something excellent. It is properly a disposition essential to our nature, and inseparable from our being, by which we desire to be happy, by which we seek the happiness we have not, and rejoice in it when we possess it. In a word, it is a uniform wish of the soul to avoid all evil, and to enjoy all good. Therefore, he who is wholly governed by self-love, properly and Scripturally speaking, will devote his whole soul to God, and earnestly and constantly seek all his peace, happiness, and salvation in the enjoyment of God. But self-love cannot make me happy. I am only the subject which receives the happiness, but am not the object that constitutes this happiness; for it is that object, properly speaking, that I love, and love not only for its own sake, but also for the sake of the happiness which I enjoy through it. "No man," saith the apostle, "ever hated his own flesh." But he that sinneth against God wrongeth his own soul, both of present and eternal salvation, and is so far from being governed by self-love that he is the implacable enemy of his best and dearest interests in both worlds."
Something I have observed time and again is that people are searching for significance. By biblically loving yourself, you are recognizing that your worth is rooted in God's perfect and unchanging love for you. In His eyes, you are a masterpiece. None of us are in our truest form yet, but that's the beauty of the whole principle. If our belief in His love is true, we will project His love onto our neighbors, for they too are masterpieces.
So love is simply being a good steward of what God has created...you and others.
I think that part of my role as a singer/songwriter and teacher/counselor is to help people change the way they think about God and themselves. If you believe that you are a masterpiece, then you no longer have a need to search for significance. The search is over! You are a masterpiece...significant and priceless! Now go share the good news of His love and mercy with all the world!
This song has been insightful for me, and I pray that it finds its way to the ears of many people who need it's message.
Masterpiece
Oh Father, be near me when I’m separated,
Remind me that I’m no longer an orphan,
Gracefully and wonderfully I was created
I will never be forgotten
Pre-Chorus:
I’m letting go of what I thought I wanted to be
Help me see myself the way that you see me
I will always love you, my debt of sin you paid
I’m learning how to love the one you made…
Chorus:
You love me Almighty-mighty, you made me, you made me a masterpiece
You love me Almighty-mighty, you made me, you made me a masterpiece
Verse:
Oh Father, be near me when I’m frustrated!
Remind me that we are your children
Love is why we were created
We all need to be forgiven
Pre-Chorus:
I’m letting go of what I thought I wanted to be
Help me see myself the way that you see me
I will always love you, my debt of sin you paid
I’m learning how to love the one you made…
Chorus
Bridge:
I can’t love my neighbor if I can’t love myself
When I feel like I’m damaged goods just left on the shelf.
Blow the dust away from a heart that is hurting
Remind me of how much you love me
Idolizing yourself comes from having your sense of worth rooted in your accomplishments or the acceptance of others. Unfortunately, neither our accomplishments nor the acceptance of others have any lasting effect on the way we behave toward our neighbors.
Clarke's Commentary on The Bible says this about Matthew 19:19 -
"Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself - Self-love, as it is generally called, has been grievously declaimed against, even by religious people, as a most pernicious and dreadful evil. But they have not understood the subject on which they spoke. They have denominated that intense propensity which unregenerate men feel to gratify their carnal appetites and vicious passions, self-love; whereas it might be more properly termed self-hatred or self-murder. If I am to love my neighbor as myself and this "love worketh no ill to its neighbor," then self-love, in the sense in which our Lord uses it, is something excellent. It is properly a disposition essential to our nature, and inseparable from our being, by which we desire to be happy, by which we seek the happiness we have not, and rejoice in it when we possess it. In a word, it is a uniform wish of the soul to avoid all evil, and to enjoy all good. Therefore, he who is wholly governed by self-love, properly and Scripturally speaking, will devote his whole soul to God, and earnestly and constantly seek all his peace, happiness, and salvation in the enjoyment of God. But self-love cannot make me happy. I am only the subject which receives the happiness, but am not the object that constitutes this happiness; for it is that object, properly speaking, that I love, and love not only for its own sake, but also for the sake of the happiness which I enjoy through it. "No man," saith the apostle, "ever hated his own flesh." But he that sinneth against God wrongeth his own soul, both of present and eternal salvation, and is so far from being governed by self-love that he is the implacable enemy of his best and dearest interests in both worlds."
Something I have observed time and again is that people are searching for significance. By biblically loving yourself, you are recognizing that your worth is rooted in God's perfect and unchanging love for you. In His eyes, you are a masterpiece. None of us are in our truest form yet, but that's the beauty of the whole principle. If our belief in His love is true, we will project His love onto our neighbors, for they too are masterpieces.
So love is simply being a good steward of what God has created...you and others.
I think that part of my role as a singer/songwriter and teacher/counselor is to help people change the way they think about God and themselves. If you believe that you are a masterpiece, then you no longer have a need to search for significance. The search is over! You are a masterpiece...significant and priceless! Now go share the good news of His love and mercy with all the world!
This song has been insightful for me, and I pray that it finds its way to the ears of many people who need it's message.
Masterpiece
Oh Father, be near me when I’m separated,
Remind me that I’m no longer an orphan,
Gracefully and wonderfully I was created
I will never be forgotten
Pre-Chorus:
I’m letting go of what I thought I wanted to be
Help me see myself the way that you see me
I will always love you, my debt of sin you paid
I’m learning how to love the one you made…
Chorus:
You love me Almighty-mighty, you made me, you made me a masterpiece
You love me Almighty-mighty, you made me, you made me a masterpiece
Verse:
Oh Father, be near me when I’m frustrated!
Remind me that we are your children
Love is why we were created
We all need to be forgiven
Pre-Chorus:
I’m letting go of what I thought I wanted to be
Help me see myself the way that you see me
I will always love you, my debt of sin you paid
I’m learning how to love the one you made…
Chorus
Bridge:
I can’t love my neighbor if I can’t love myself
When I feel like I’m damaged goods just left on the shelf.
Blow the dust away from a heart that is hurting
Remind me of how much you love me
Labels:
grace,
human value,
love,
mercy,
self-esteem,
self-worth,
songwriting
Monday, June 21, 2010
You're Holding Me
Well this will be the first time I've written a song and recorded it in the same month...I'll be recording You're Holding Me with a studio band at Sunset Blvd Studios with Steve Dady. I'm really looking forward to this session. My wife and daughters will be stopping in. God will be there...AND it's a prophetic worship tune at that...I can't wait.
In addition to this tune, I will be putting down vocals and acoustic guitar for You Provide.
Prelude
Mom, I really miss you
Dad, when will I see you?
I wait for you to come home every day
School is never easy
Friends; they sometimes leave me
I’m starting to feel angry every day
When the weeks get long and the days get lonely
I cast my cares on the one who holds me
Verse
I will not worry about anything, but in everything, pray, pray, pray
And I’m so thankful for all that You have done
Your peace that passes understanding guards my way
Pre Chorus
When the weeks get long, and the days get lonely
I cast my cares on the one who holds me
Chorus
I know that Jesus, You’re holding me, You won’t let me slip and fall down
I know that Jesus, You’re holding me, I’m not alone; I’m where I need to be
In the arms of the Almighty
Verse
I will be patient when troubles come, and every day I will live by faith
And I will remember all that You have done
Your joy comes in the morning of a brand new day
Pre Chorus
When the weeks get long and the days get lonely
I cast my cares on the one who holds me
Bridge
Come and make your home with me, Father
Come and make your home with me, Jesus
Come and make your home with me, Spirit
Come and make and home with me…
In addition to this tune, I will be putting down vocals and acoustic guitar for You Provide.
You're Holding Me
Prelude
Mom, I really miss you
Dad, when will I see you?
I wait for you to come home every day
School is never easy
Friends; they sometimes leave me
I’m starting to feel angry every day
When the weeks get long and the days get lonely
I cast my cares on the one who holds me
Verse
I will not worry about anything, but in everything, pray, pray, pray
And I’m so thankful for all that You have done
Your peace that passes understanding guards my way
Pre Chorus
When the weeks get long, and the days get lonely
I cast my cares on the one who holds me
Chorus
I know that Jesus, You’re holding me, You won’t let me slip and fall down
I know that Jesus, You’re holding me, I’m not alone; I’m where I need to be
In the arms of the Almighty
Verse
I will be patient when troubles come, and every day I will live by faith
And I will remember all that You have done
Your joy comes in the morning of a brand new day
Pre Chorus
When the weeks get long and the days get lonely
I cast my cares on the one who holds me
Chorus
Bridge
Come and make your home with me, Father
Come and make your home with me, Jesus
Come and make your home with me, Spirit
Come and make and home with me…
Labels:
Prophetic,
songwriting,
Steve Dady,
Sunset Blvd Studios
Thursday, November 12, 2009
The Intervention
On November 8th, I spoke on God's grace at Life Hurts, God Heals. In preparing for the lesson, I was reminded of an amazing example of grace that changed my life forever.
It all began one August day in 2007. Rachel, Mikah, and I were visiting my family in Cleveland, Ohio. Little did I know, there were more than three family members that flew into Cleveland that week.
I'll never forget the afternoon when Rachel asked me to come and talk to her. I had just gotten home with my dad and Mikah. I recognized the tone in her voice, so I rushed upstairs to meet her. I figured she had bought a pair of shoes or splurged on a new dress or something, no big deal, right? Boy, was I wrong. There are no words to articulate the array of feelings that pulsed through my body when Rachel handed me the positive pregnancy test.
I remember hearing something that closely resembled the shards of my shattered dreams falling to the floor. I was speechless...awkwardly speechless. However, my thoughts were traveling at light speeds. I began thinking, "I just knew that since Rachel and I had only wanted one child since the day we met, it was our destiny, right? And I just started graduate school last year. How am I ever going to finish with another baby in the picture? And what about my music...It's all over!" All the plans that I had in mind of how our life was going to unfold were obliterated that day.
The problem did not begin with my state of shock that day. The problem began shortly after we arrived back in Memphis when I decided to begin riding the lonely train of fear. No human could stop the train of thought that I was riding. I was going full-steam ahead to a place where love did not exist. I was determined that this baby was going to ruin my life. As a matter of fact, I denied that wife was even pregnant for three months. I avoided the topic altogether.
Then one night, God decided enough was enough. I was in a state of fear and distress, and I was convinced that nothing could or would change the way I felt about my situation. Then, God showed up. That night, God decided to completely change the way that I was thinking and feeling. God's grace came to me in the form a dream that I could not have produced on my own.
That night a little girl visited me in my dream. It wasn't Mikah, and it wasn't Rachel, but I had an overwhelming feeling that I had known this little girl for many years. With a sweet and soft voice, she said, "Daddy, I love you." I remember beginning to cry as I realized who she was. She was the child my wife was carrying. Her voice and her smile seemed to calm the storm that had been raging in my mind for three months. I remember looking into her eyes, and hearing Jesus say, "Everything is going to be alright." I looked at her and said, "I love you...thank you." Then, I remember seeing her run off to play with Mikah and Rachel.
I woke up that morning feeling refreshed and revived. I looked over at Rachel sleeping and I smiled. I looked at her pregnant belly, and felt a sense of warmth. I already knew the baby girl inside.
That morning, I realized that I had gotten so dependent on my carefully laid out plans for a sense of security, that I couldn't recognize the beautiful gift that God had given me.
It wasn't a lesson on earthly dependence that I learned that morning. What I learned is that God's grace is a beautiful force that empowers us to move forward when we are stuck. Ephesians 2:5 says, "Though we were spiritually dead because of the things we did against God, he gave us new life in Christ. You have been saved through God's grace."
That night, God saved me through grace. My thoughts and feelings were headed to a place where love did not exist, yet he showered his love on me in a dream that night, and I was changed. What a wonderful God we serve.
Now, the only thing left I had to do was convince Rachel that we were having a girl.
It all began one August day in 2007. Rachel, Mikah, and I were visiting my family in Cleveland, Ohio. Little did I know, there were more than three family members that flew into Cleveland that week.
I'll never forget the afternoon when Rachel asked me to come and talk to her. I had just gotten home with my dad and Mikah. I recognized the tone in her voice, so I rushed upstairs to meet her. I figured she had bought a pair of shoes or splurged on a new dress or something, no big deal, right? Boy, was I wrong. There are no words to articulate the array of feelings that pulsed through my body when Rachel handed me the positive pregnancy test.
I remember hearing something that closely resembled the shards of my shattered dreams falling to the floor. I was speechless...awkwardly speechless. However, my thoughts were traveling at light speeds. I began thinking, "I just knew that since Rachel and I had only wanted one child since the day we met, it was our destiny, right? And I just started graduate school last year. How am I ever going to finish with another baby in the picture? And what about my music...It's all over!" All the plans that I had in mind of how our life was going to unfold were obliterated that day.
The problem did not begin with my state of shock that day. The problem began shortly after we arrived back in Memphis when I decided to begin riding the lonely train of fear. No human could stop the train of thought that I was riding. I was going full-steam ahead to a place where love did not exist. I was determined that this baby was going to ruin my life. As a matter of fact, I denied that wife was even pregnant for three months. I avoided the topic altogether.
Then one night, God decided enough was enough. I was in a state of fear and distress, and I was convinced that nothing could or would change the way I felt about my situation. Then, God showed up. That night, God decided to completely change the way that I was thinking and feeling. God's grace came to me in the form a dream that I could not have produced on my own.
That night a little girl visited me in my dream. It wasn't Mikah, and it wasn't Rachel, but I had an overwhelming feeling that I had known this little girl for many years. With a sweet and soft voice, she said, "Daddy, I love you." I remember beginning to cry as I realized who she was. She was the child my wife was carrying. Her voice and her smile seemed to calm the storm that had been raging in my mind for three months. I remember looking into her eyes, and hearing Jesus say, "Everything is going to be alright." I looked at her and said, "I love you...thank you." Then, I remember seeing her run off to play with Mikah and Rachel.
I woke up that morning feeling refreshed and revived. I looked over at Rachel sleeping and I smiled. I looked at her pregnant belly, and felt a sense of warmth. I already knew the baby girl inside.
That morning, I realized that I had gotten so dependent on my carefully laid out plans for a sense of security, that I couldn't recognize the beautiful gift that God had given me.
It wasn't a lesson on earthly dependence that I learned that morning. What I learned is that God's grace is a beautiful force that empowers us to move forward when we are stuck. Ephesians 2:5 says, "Though we were spiritually dead because of the things we did against God, he gave us new life in Christ. You have been saved through God's grace."
That night, God saved me through grace. My thoughts and feelings were headed to a place where love did not exist, yet he showered his love on me in a dream that night, and I was changed. What a wonderful God we serve.
Now, the only thing left I had to do was convince Rachel that we were having a girl.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Coming Clean
This past Sunday night I taught #6 of 13 lessons in a teen recovery series called Life Hurts God Heals. Lesson 6 was about confessing and coming clean. Even though I have a solid understanding of the contents of this lesson, the combination of activities touched me deeply, and I felt God's presence with us. I was especially moved by the scriptures used which were some of my favorites when I was struggling with the darkest of my depressive episodes as a teenager: Jeremiah 29:11 (of course this one is my favorite!), Psalm 40:2-3 (wrote a song about this years ago), 1 Peter 5:8, James 4:7, Isaiah 1:18, 1 John 1:9, and 2 Corinthians 5:17.
I like the perspective of some of the people in large group who said that confessing shouldn't happen only when we have hit bottom. I agree. I also like the idea that confessing isn't always about things we have done, but things that have been done to us. The reason I like this idea is that as we confess what has been done to us, it makes it that much easier to be accountable to each other on how we handle our hurts. Coming clean is about everything we are thinking and feeling. When we come clean, there is no way we can climb back into the cave of denial and let issues get swept under the rug.
Finally, the finale of the lesson was turning to the person to our right and saying, "You are not an accident, Your life has purpose and power in Jesus. Coming clean lets us stay focused on our need for help of the power of Jesus through the people he puts in our lives. We can stand together and recognize God's power, and thank him for his faithfulness.
I like the perspective of some of the people in large group who said that confessing shouldn't happen only when we have hit bottom. I agree. I also like the idea that confessing isn't always about things we have done, but things that have been done to us. The reason I like this idea is that as we confess what has been done to us, it makes it that much easier to be accountable to each other on how we handle our hurts. Coming clean is about everything we are thinking and feeling. When we come clean, there is no way we can climb back into the cave of denial and let issues get swept under the rug.
Finally, the finale of the lesson was turning to the person to our right and saying, "You are not an accident, Your life has purpose and power in Jesus. Coming clean lets us stay focused on our need for help of the power of Jesus through the people he puts in our lives. We can stand together and recognize God's power, and thank him for his faithfulness.
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